While George and Jerry are walking down the street, a stranger asks George to watch a bag of luggage for a minute. When the stranger doesn’t return, George starts wearing some of the clothes from the bag, using the rationale that “I’m still watching them.” While he walks down the street in the tourist’s clothes, looking at a map, a woman who works for the New York Visitor’s Center (Rena Sofer) mistakes George for a tourist and introduces herself as Mary Anne. George pretends that he is visiting from Little Rock, Arkansas, where he works as a hen supervisor for the Tyler Chicken company.
They go to Monk’s Café, where George continues to lie to Mary Anne about himself. George finds her attractive, and she is interested in him, but she doesn’t want to get involved, believing he will be leaving soon. To prolong the relationship, he tells her he’s thinking of ‘moving’ to New York; she replies that the city would eat him alive. George is insulted by this and sets out to prove he can get by in New York by showing her his ‘new’ apartment and his office where he works for the New York Yankees. Then Steinbrenner enters George’s office and Mary Anne tells him of George’s alleged job with Tyler Chicken.
Steinbrenner is impressed that George is moonlighting, and he phones the CEO of Tyler Chicken to announce that he does not want to share George. They haggle, and Mr. Tyler says, “How about this. You give me Costanza, I convert your concessions to all chicken, no charge. Instead of hot dogs, chicken dogs. Instead of pretzels, chicken twists. Instead of beer, alcoholic chicken.”
Eventually, the tourist returns for his clothes and is upset that George is wearing them; he takes his clothes off George, leaving him in his briefs and thereby ending his relationship with Mary Anne.
Jerry notices his chest hair is uneven and tries to straighten it out, but ends up shaving it all off. He worries what his girlfriend Alex (Melinda Clarke) will think, until he discovers she is fond of hairless dogs. He continues to shave his chest, despite Kramer’s warning about hair growth.
While eating a muffin, Elaine mentions to Mr. Lippman, her former boss, that she only eats the tops, and that a store selling just the tops would be a million dollar idea. Lippman decides to start a business, called Top of the Muffin to You!, based on Elaine’s idea. Elaine is outraged that he stole her idea. When the business starts to fail, Lippman asks Elaine for advice and bribes her with 30% of the profits. She tells him that he must make the whole muffin and then pop the top from the stump[3]; she also demands that he remove the exclamation point from his sign. (“It’s not top of the muffin TO YOU!” Elaine says. Lippman replies, “No, no, it is.”) This gives the business a boost, but leaves them with the problem of disposing of the muffin stumps. They initially give the stumps to the homeless shelter, but after complaints about the missing muffin tops, they have to get rid of them somewhere else. Elaine eventually hires a “cleaner” (Newman, in a Pulp Fiction spoof) to make the muffin stump problem go away until the store gets private garbage removal.
Kramer learns from Elaine that the stories he had sold to J. Peterman in a previous episode were put into Peterman’s biography. Kramer goes to the book signing, claiming he is the “real” Peterman. He then starts conducting “The Peterman Reality Tour” on a school bus for $37.50 a piece. Kramer asks Jerry and his girlfriend to take the tour and, while Elaine enters, she asks Kramer to get rid of the muffin stumps on his tour in return. Jerry’s chest begins itching from hair growth, as Kramer searches for a dump that will take the stumps. Jerry’s itching makes him run into the forest to scratch his chest; when the moon comes out he howls like the Wolf Man.